Social Matters >> Education & Upbringing

Question # : 1458

United States of America

Respected Scholar: We sent some of our kids to a so called darul uloom here in USA upon my spouse wish in spite of the fact that darul uloom was 6 hours flight from our city and my view was that sending them that far we will not be able to see them very often specially the girls plus it will be very expensive as we are a medium class family. We have spent all our financial resources on them even if we have to cut some times on our budget. After 4-5 years something very, very bad happened to our daughter by the people who were running this darul uloom, when we found out we almost passed away as we could never even think of such acts by the so called pious people and we have to take all our kids from the darul ulooms and brought them back home and wanted to send them to get the regular education. All of them have gone back to regular schools and doing okay except one who is Hafiz and refused to go to regular school, he has spent last five years in his room playing games and on the computer. They all are so rebellious and bitter that you can not talk or advise them on any issue they will start abusing you verbally and physically blaming us the parents that we have ruined their lives by bringing them home and not completing Islamic education. Now after five years as parents we are so depressed, helpless, worried and stressed about them and regretting every second of life that why we sent them in such places which are run by evil people who do not think that hoe their evil acts will effect and ruined the families ? It worries us about their future without proper education how they are going to live and afford them self, we have tried to get professional help but they refused to cooperate and same with their marriages they are not interested.They hardly help or participate in any house hold cleaning and choirs The atmosphere at home is aways very tense which has affected our other younger children We seek your advise and help in the light of Islam what should we do what we did wrong Was it wrong that we removed them from these knd of darul-ulooms?

Answer : 1458

Published on: Sep 2, 2007

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

(Fatwa: 1395/1084=H)


Try to get them convinced with wisdom, insight, kindness and affection. Also, after five time prayers and Tahajjud, recite Surah Quraish and Surah Fatihah 7 times with Durood before and after them daily, blow on water and drink it to your children. Moreover, supplicate Allah and beg His mercy.

Allah knows Best!

Darul Ifta,
Darul Uloom Deoband

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